So this topic has been sitting on my heart for a few weeks now. Honestly, I felt as if I did not have the accurate words to talk about how I was feeling in relation to all that has been happening around me and my brand.
So I first wanted to share that the last few months for me as both a scholar, a speaker, educator and activist have been interesting. I have been to so many places and I have had so many people reach out to me to share my experience as a queer Black influencer. While I am thankful for having a loving partner and friends/chosen family who support all that I do, there are still those moments where imposter syndrome and self skepticism come into play.
The greatest struggle in anyone's life, regardless of your intersectional experiences, is to believe that you are worthy of the great things that come your way. Going further, it can be hard as a marginalized individual to accept that you deserve the success you attain, because ya know: supremacy?
Alas, today I write this as a reminder to anyone working on making their dreams come true that the road is extremely long, hard and exhausting. But what is most important is to believe in you and your message, even when others don't.
Something I am very passionate about these days it talking to people about what my struggle looks like, because society sugarcoats success.
In the last six I have been told, "no" more than any other time in my life. Further, I have had companies, organization and college institutions who I KNOW have funding try to get me to work for pennies, if not for free. I will admit, it is painful to sit back and ask yourself, "Why is my success so slow", OR "Why am I not PAID for what I know?" But in holding this conversation with yourself, you have got to believe that no matter WHEN it happens in your life, that will be the time that it is meant to happen.
As someone who is has had some pretty cool wins in the last few months, it would be easy for me to say, "Give it time because all things take time". But honestly, the best advice I was ever given by someone was to think about the feeling that comes with the struggle and how amazing it feels when you can say that even in times that were most hard, you never gave up on yourself.
Honestly, as I sit here and write this I can say that this post is more for me than anyone else. But I am writing this because I felt like someone else needed to hear this too.
We were not built to break. Our success isn't measured on how many times someone kicks us, how many times we trip or how many times we fall, but how many times we get back up and keep walking. The worth of your voice, what you provide to this world and how you affect other people's journey is solely yours to own.
While my work is not known on a global scale, I take pride in knowing that half the work has been done. I am taking risk, moving forward leaps and bounds as I lay the foundation to my dreams. Though there are very few who may support them, I have found the folks that matter in the building process and THAT my friend, means more than anything.
Continue to struggle. Continue to fight. The best things come out of resistence.
Remember that you journey to "success" is often less traveled because if it was easy, anyone and everyone would be doing it. Something I read once is that those who are the most successful in this life, whether personally/monetarily, have seen things that we will never be able to comprehend.
In short, if we continue to base our worth on what others believe we can or can't do, we will never be who we are intended to be. Continue to keep pushing and know that in the end, the only person that should believe in you more than you IS YOU because you are the ONLY one doing the work in both the good and the bad.
Keep fighting until the ALL of the fight are won!